I want what you want! I trust you & I love you!
It is always refreshing to meet someone that you share things in common with, whose attractive and who you have a general interest in. It is great to share laughs, talk about life, but most importantly discuss our relationships with God.
However, in my mind I can’t help but think about marriage, because with God I know that a regular relationship or boyfriend/girlfriend type experience is not going to work for me. My standards are set and I will not waiver. The cost of compromise is a high price, and I am not sure if I am willing to renege. I don’t think that it is too much to ask for me to want to marry a man who does not have any children, and preferably who has never been married before. Two children and a previous marriage is major pill that I don’t think I can swallow. Additionally, age is not just a number. My mother is 20 years younger than my dad, and I don’t want this for my children, at all. I want to be close in age to my husband.
I enjoy having friends, but right now all I want is something innocent and platonic until I feel I have met the one. Loving and seeking God daily is a requirement and the base for any relationship. Also there is no 90 day rule or sex until I am married, and that is non-neogotiable.
I respect him because he values the call on my life, and recognizes God’s presence in my life & space. He understands that coming and being anything but sincere, and pure will not work with me. He respects my standards, and honors me as a individual but most importantly as a woman. This is what I need and more.
But for now, I will stayed prayed up and focused on God. It is amazing how as I meet people, I feel so safe running to God for wisdom and discernment. The more I think about marriage and true commitment, I think about my relationship with Christ and how I need him in every area of my life. I also need him to truly show me in more than one way what he has in mind for me regarding relationships and marriage.
I desire to be married but I just want it to be right. I want to feel at ease and at peace in my relationship with my husband and at ease knowing I know without a shadow of doubt that God approves. For now, patience prevails as I prepare for my future working to create and work in my purpose.
"Beyond excited that my gift is about to make room for me, and set the world on FIRE!"